Estelea's Blog

French Mum, humanitarian, restless explorer and doer on sabbatical in Cebu (Philippines): one Attila in each arm, I am exploring the “toddlers safe” corners of the region, while trying to keep some room for Me.

Why Motherhood must come with Waterproof mascara

Motherhood has turned me into a sprinkler: I am moved to tears so easily that it’s embarrassing. I Can’t watch a sad movie anymore, let alone the news. I couldn’t even made the first episode of Games of Thrones. I even cried the first time we watched Frozen. Yep. Motherhood does change you.


My Attilas have pierced the big armor I had built to protect myself from painful emotions. A good aid worker can’t be too emotional, or else you burn out too fast. It’s all about Empathy, no Sympathy. Be strong enough to help.

My Mum used to irritate me beyond words when she was telling me “Good you do this job before having children. Everything will be different after“. Why would a couple of kids ever change Me? I was naive enough to think that motherhood would left me as strong as I was before. Sure…

How many times did I tell my Mum that I would raise my children totally differently, and give them much more freedom than I had, let them live their life and never don’t ask too many questions. Sure…

Now I have children on my own, I realize how cool she’s been with me and my brothers. My kids are still toddlers, and I am a far more anxious and scared mother than she’d ever been. I am doing my best to give them space and teach them to be (a very little bit) independent. “Buddhism for mothers” has been on my coffee table for ages. I agree with every line. But the detachment thing does not talk to me at all when it comes to my kids.

I am no longer the centre of my world, I relinquish that to my children. Those guys are my oxygen.

No wonder those lines moved me to tears. They totally echo motherhood to me. I ‘ll be like my mother, and her mother before her, swallowing my fears and always encourage my children, push them, have faith in them. When my daughter will have children on her own, I’ll share those lines with her. By then, she’ll understand.

Till then, cheers to all the Panda Moms out there 🙂



18 comments on “Why Motherhood must come with Waterproof mascara

  1. Hubert
    June 18, 2015

    wonderfully analyzed and phrased! 🙂
    And even if I might be the only man on this planet to admit it: having kids has certainly made me more emotional as well… it is a joy, as well as a pain, and I’d never want to miss it.
    Thanks for some really fantastic lines!

    • estelea
      June 18, 2015

      Thank you so much Hubert! I love your message, so touching (you are going to get lots of women followers with your “emotional coming out”, be careful ;). You summed it all perfectly: “it’s a joy, it’s a pain, and I’d never want to miss it”. Cheers to great parents of great kids!

      • Hubert
        June 18, 2015

        lol – I don’t think so. Emotional coming out or not, women & sailing hardly ever go well together 😉 (unless, of course, enough rum’s on board, as you mentioned in a previous post…)

      • estelea
        June 18, 2015

        See, you do know how to talk to women 😀

  2. So true. And yes I wanted that last piece of pie. 😦 🙂

  3. Pingback: Moved to Tears by “The Artist” (2011) | Ramisa the Authoress

  4. Yvette Bouaziz
    June 18, 2015

    Bienvenue à “mama land”.tu as tout compris.mon papa me disait:”être parent est un contrat à vie “courage! Il y a tellement plus de joies que de larmes.♡♡♡♡♡♡

  5. Debbie H
    June 18, 2015

    That’s all very true! It doesn’t seem to change even though your children grow up – you never stop having those feelings!! Enjoyed your post!

    • estelea
      June 18, 2015

      It never ceases to amaze me, the true meaning of “Unconditional Love”… THanks so much for your kind words Debbie 🙂

  6. LDG luciledegodoy
    June 20, 2015

    And you brought tears to my eyes…❤️

    • estelea
      June 21, 2015

      got a stock of waterproof mascara, really good stuff. Will be happy to send you one too 😉

  7. LifestyleswithLia
    June 23, 2015

    My dearest! I’ve been away from my blog recently but I’m back and love this post you wrote! Your emotions and love for your family come through your beautiful words. What an incredible woman you are and what an amazing family you come from and you have created!
    Much love and hugs to you my friend! And the mascara/panda photo is perfect!

    • estelea
      June 23, 2015

      You really know how to melt my heart with your precious words! good I still have waterproof mascara 🙂 Thanks so much my dear ❤

      • LifestyleswithLia
        June 23, 2015

        Thank you my dearest! Many, many hugs!!!

      • estelea
        June 23, 2015

        BIG One back to you 🙂

      • estelea
        June 23, 2015

        (back AT you, right? )

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This entry was posted on June 18, 2015 by in Family, Me, Parenting and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , .

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